Learning to submit is not hard for everyone so let me make it clear this blog post is directed toward men who spent majority of their lives as the dominant partner in majority of their relationships. As a large group of men already know how to submit as they are proud beta males, there is some men that would like to give up control once in a while. However being someone who is primarily dominant myself it can be a struggle to learn how to submit.
Take The Step To Be Vulnerable
First thing I notice with a new caller is how vocal they are. The more willing to ask what they want tells me how submissive they are. Being very tight-lipped tells me that being in a vulnerable position is not common for you. This can be first time jitters or someone who is still learning to submit. Even asking for their fantasy can be hard as it requires vulnerability. A gift that one who is primarily dominant can’t give over so easily. Trust me I am aware of this. So what should one do to make this transition easier?
Consider focusing on finding a mistress who can switch. One that is knowledgeable on learning to submit, and being in control. As us switch mistresses tend to understand the daunting reality of giving up control that keeps us comfortable. You may find it much easier to relate with one another, which can certainly ease some of the hesitation. Don’t be afraid to ask questions and share inputs with each other.
Which leads into the next point of don’t rush it. If you want to genuinely give up control to another person when it’s not your normal style then take your time. Have a conversation and get to know the other person. Submitting to a mistress requires you to trust her, to be comfortable sharing your fetish/kink life with her. Sometimes sharing parts of yourself you may find embarrassing. So embrace reaching a certain personal level of getting to know each other without crossing eithers set boundaries.
If you are going to learn to submit then you need to be honest with yourself and your chosen mistress. That means keeping your ego in check and knowing what you want. That’s the one benefit of being someone who’s use to control, that knowing what you want is easy. It’s the asking for it that can be difficult, especially when it’s outside your comfort zone. Just remember you’ll get no where just twiddling your thumbs and hoping your mistress also happens to be a psychic. Doing that is going to waste the time of both parties and not just yourself.
Ways to approach this is make sure you are indeed in that submissive mood. Don’t try to force it cause you think it’s just an itch that you need to get out of your system, cause it’s not. It will stay in your system and grow especially if not taken care of correctly. Perhaps you are in an on and off again mood with your submission. Take the time to just talk with a mistress. Establish that relationship so when you are certainly in the mood you can feel more comfortable opening up to your kink or fetish. In fact just talking about it in general can raise your arousal and lead into a smoother transition to play.
Learning To Submit
Remember when learning to submit it’s not the kind of thing you take the plunge on. If it’s outside of your nature just like it is for me then take your time. The urge to submit is there, the next step is learning how to address it. Find out where the urge comes from, or what kink/fetish is driving it. Do some research and look for a mistress or mistresses that get along well with your personality in both your submissive self and non-submissive self. Establish a trusting relationship that will ease you into submitting to her. Then allow your exploration to unfold naturally. It’s one of those easier said then done dilemmas but don’t let that stop you!
Listen to what I have to say from my own experience as a switch mistress below!
Your Sensual Tease Mistress,